Vanna's insides

Vanna's insides

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Why...?

The hardest part of this entire process (which began mid-December) has been telling people about my decision/current circumstances.  It's really hard for people to understand, and they seem to want/need more from me than I can offer them.  Why am I doing this?  Well... I think I'll have perfected my response in a few months, but for now, I may still be trying to figure that part out myself.

But some of the reasons, are as follows...

- having an apartment to retreat to encourages hiding from the World, which in turn creates loneliness
- the lifestyle i was so privileged to grow up with is no longer something i am financially able to sustain
- the lifestyle i was so privileged to grow up with is no longer something i am morally able to sustain
- the amount of space i had encouraged me to buy more and more things to fill it/maintain it/decorate it
- i had a messy roommate
- i was feeling a little trapped/stuck/locked down
- this feels like an adventure
- it excited me
- it will force me to live with intention (actions must be planned out, it it nearly impossible to realize you've just spent three hours surfing the internet/scrolling through facebook/reading blogs)
- i will become a part of a city in a way i've never managed to before (i always have to be somewhere)
- i will simplify my life

Dinnertime blogging
Considering the reactions I've received to the news of living in my van, I'm surprised by how not extreme the adjustment has been; granted, it is day 1...

I feel supported and taken care of by my city and my community.  I had originally planned to get out of Victoria this afternoon in order to really bond with my situation, become used to/comfortable with my new circumstances, but there is nothing about it that feels unnatural or necessary to adjust to.  I had been most worried about it feeling like a last resort, as though I was stuck with returning to the van at night, but it really hasn't been that way at all.  It feels precious and special and all mine... which it is.
Cafe-ing
People's reactions/confusion/fear/assumptions to the news are hard.  I often feel sad when I'm unable to make people feel about my life the way I feel about it, but it's something I'm becoming used to the more times I tell people.

Quinn is responding great to van life.  I feel much more confident about her ability to adjust now.  I bought a leash to test out (which will be another blog post all its own), and will take her a-wandering soon.

Til next time...

Bon appetit!

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